What Jessica Jones Can Teach Us About Abusive Relationships

Abusive relationships are a very real and very horrible problem in our society….Here is what Marvel’s Jessica Jones does to shine a light on this fact.

 

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So I’ve recently watched the TV show Jessica Jones and as I made my way through the show, I started to notice something about the antagonist of the show (played by actor David Tennant) I’ve seen signs on how the antagonist of the show, Kilgrave, though he has super powers, is actually an abuser.

 

Here is what I’ve noticed: In terms of abuse it seems her abusers approach was that of emotional abuse.

What is emotional abuse? It involves a regular pattern of verbal offense, threatening, bullying, and constant criticism, as well as more subtle tactics like intimidation, shaming and manipulation. Emotional abuse is used to control and subjugate the other person, and quite often it occurs because the abuser has childhood wounds and insecurities they haven’t dealt with — perhaps as a result of being abused themselves.

Yes, he has mind controlling powers but the way we have seen them being used, especially on this one character (and the side effects it all had on Jessica Jones) we have seen how he uses it to abuse and control people.

 

  • He is controlling in the sense of always needing to know where she is going, what she is going to be doing, taking her phone and making sure (by making threats he goes through with) she is back within certain time frames.

 

  • Her abuser also plays the victim. (common trait in most abusers) That the actual victim of the abuser is making them do things or something else made them do it. Like things are his victims fault. an example was a conversation in Episode 7 that Jones has with her abuser. (its a little later in the post) There was a time where he would make Jessica Jones hurt herself then make himself save her, pretending to protect her and be the hero or he would make statements such as: “You never appreciate anything I do for you.” making himself the victim and turning it around on Jones herself. Making her think he wasn’t doing anything wrong.

 

  • After her leaving him and getting out of his control, Kilgrave is dead set on finding her and has developed stalker like behaviors (which he probably had before to some extent). Taking photos of her, having others take photos of her and follow her (etc.) Which leads into my last point. Abusers isolate the victim of the abuse. In the scene I’m gonna share in a moment you see this play out in terms of the fact that her abuser is trying to isolate her from everyone she knows. (In this case, killing people close to her doesn’t stop this guy but this is a TV show and a super villain we are talking about in this sense.) In return he is telling her things, professing feelings for her and in result trying to make sure she is isolated and only hearing his words and his opinions.

*spoilers following as I am going to discuss the conversation in this specific scene*

Kilgrave: “I will admit to keeping eyes on you. Spies are easy to come by for me.”

Jones: “Do whatever you are going to do to me, but let them go.” (There is a hostage scene taking place here as Kilgrave is using his powers to hold a whole room of people hostage)

Kilgrave: “Well I have to protect myself so…”

Jones: “Then control me, not them.”

Kilgrave: “I have absolutely no intention of controlling you. I want you to act on your own accord.”

She (Jones) asks: “Act how? Suicide? Is that why you’ve been torturing me?”

Kilgrave, her abuser, then states: “*chuckles* Oh my God, Jessica, I knew you were insecure. That’s just sad. I’m not torturing you. Why would I? I love you.

 

The scene continues and Jones calls her abuser out on his actions calling them a ‘demented declaration of love.’ and how he ruined her life in this act. She couldn’t be any closer to the truth.

Her abuser then says he was trying to make her see “That I’m the only one who matches you… Who challenges you… Who’ll do anything for you.” – In any other case this might almost sound romantic because who doesn’t want to be with someone who will do anything for you or challenges you for the better? But as you can see its not romantic. Not in this sense. Not when he is stalking her, killing her friends and family (he killed a young man who claimed to love Jessica), and becoming obsessive….Trying to get her back.

He then becomes angry (he’s very short fused.) when someones cell phone rings and it interrupts his professing ‘eternal love’

 

 

 

Now sure, no one has superpowers either so this whole abusive situation might be over-dramatized for the show but I feel Marvel was clever in this sense. They took a mind controlling super villain and used him and his abilities to shine a light on abuse. What that looks like and how it might appear to the victim as well. You don’t have to have powers to control or harm someone. If you did this wouldn’t be a real problem, would it? But despite the fact that this character has powers it doesn’t change the fact that he is an abuser and I think Marvel did a really good job in conveying that and not portraying an antagonists actions as okay or somewhat acceptable as most media might convey things.

 

Would You Rather Blog Tag

Hello Readers!

So, as you can tell the summer plan I had which consisted of blog tags and such didn’t really happen. (I give a brief explanation as to why HERE )

So, Brett tagged me for this a LONG time ago and I’m still so excited! It looks like a fun tag! (Thanks Brett!)

 

Would you rather…

Read only trilogies or stand-alones?

Oh my goodness. That’s a hard decision! I’m gonna have to say trilogies.

 

Read only female or male authors?

Really? Really? Why am I being this question? *freaks out* *starts to hyperventilate* I-I don’t know. (Brett, are you trying to kill me? LOL )

Shop at Barnes & Noble or Amazon?

Well…Here we have Chapters (the Canadian branch of Barnes and Noble) and I LOVE Chapters…So I’m gonna have to say Chapters.

All books become movies or TV shows?

TV SHOWS! With a TV show you could actually do like an episode per chapter of the show or something! Then there would be no excuses for the filmmakers to leave one teeny tiny detail out. Or…maybe I should just make all the movies so people wouldn’t mess them up.

Read 5 pages per day or 5 books per week?

5 Books a week please!

Be a professional reviewer or author?

*whimpers* You-You mean I can’t be both? I guess I’ll go with author… *grumbles about how these questions are not fair*

 

Only read your top 20 favorite books over and over or always read new ones that you haven’t read before?

I would say top 20 favourite books. (What those top 20 are, I don’t know. So don’t ask haha!)

 

Be a librarian or book seller?

Librarian please!!

Only read your favorite genre, or every genre except your favorite?

Ohhhhh boy….I-I don’t know.  DX

Only read physical books or eBooks?

Physical books! Sadly eBooks give me major headaches so I can’t read a lot of pages at a time or whatever.

Now, I don’t really know who to tag for this to be honest because I’ve been out for the summer I don’t know who might have done it already. Soon…. THIS TAG IS OPEN TO ANYONE!

*Update as of 9:45 am on September 2nd* So I left my blogger friend, Grace Meredith out of this tag, so I am tagging here here 😛 BUT it’s still open to everyone ok?

~ Grace’s blog

Until Next Time!

Adriana G.

Top Ten Tuesday ||Top Ten Books I’d Love To See As Movies/TV Shows

Hello Readers!

I’m back, once again, with a Top Ten Tuesday and I am excited for this weeks topic! And that is, What Books I want to see as either a movie or TV show.

*Note: Top Ten Tuesday is a Linkup Hosted by the Broke and Bookish

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1. A movie trilogy of Laura L. Smith’s Status Update Series!

Nuff said. This needs to happen!

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2. Same goes for Rajdeep Paulus’s Trilogy of Books.

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3. We Were Liars (By E. Lockhart) TV Series

Oh come on, admit it. That would be a super cool TV show.

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4. Movie of The Story of Owen by E.K Johnston

Modern day dragon hunter, quirky characters, dragons. Movie set in Canada? Yah. Sign me up.

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5. The Sehret Chronicles (C.F Barrows) Movies

Yah. This needs to happen people. I NEED movies of Follower and The Merchant’s Son…and the other upcoming books. Like you have no idea how badly I need movies of these books!

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6. Movie of Becoming the Chateran by S.J Aisling

This would be such an epic fantasy movie. Must happen.

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7. Movie of Swept To Sea by Heather Manning

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8. Movie of The Sound of Diamonds by Rachelle Rea

The book itself doesn’t release until the 15th of June, but let me tell you people, the book is wonderful and a movie of it would also be wonderful!

The Sound of Diamonds

 

 

9. Glass Girl and Perfect Glass (By Laura Anderson Kurk) movies

Such beautiful books! If these were made into movies, I would cry….then I would go watch the movies and cry while watching them.

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10. Movie of Forest of Whispers by Jennifer Murgia

This..would be an awesome movie!

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A to Z Challenge || Letter O: Once

Hello Readers!

OSo today, I will be letting my inner fangirl loose here. I’ve been looking forward to this post ever since I planned out all my posts for this challenge!

*Warning: This is Fangirl territory on which you now stand. Many GIFs, Images, and EXTREME fangirling to Follow!*

Today I’m going to be talking about one of my all time favourite TV shows and that show is ‘Once Upon A Time’ (Or referenced as OUAT )

So, for those of you who don’t know what OUAT is let me explain… *takes a deep breath*

So, Peter Pan had a son, who is the Crocodile. The Crocodile gets married and has a son, but the Crocodile’s wife leaves him for Captain Hook. Peter Pan’s grandson gets together with the daughter of Snow White and Prince Charming, and they have a son. The son is adopted by the Evil Queen, who is the daughter of The Queen of Hearts, who once upon a time loved the Beast, who is also the Crocodile, but she ripped out her own heart. Now the Crocodile is trapped in a box, that he asked Ariel to have Belle fetch for him…and the show is basically all these people coming together and realizing they’re all related and it’s strange…and everyone fights a lot. AND THATS THE SHOW PEOPLE!

Any questions?

I seriously wish I was kidding… That is basically the show…Haha, okay thats me being silly (yet not) but seriously the show is amazing the show is basically where these fairytale characters are stuck in the modern world with no memory of who they are because of a curse that was put on them and yeah…But seriously just picture it. Fairytale characters…In the modern world.

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Throughout this show there is a LOT of shipping and I mean A LOT…and many BEAUTIFUL characters. Like Captain Hook. (My fellow (girl) Oncers, will know what I’m talking about.)

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Many ships…

Though…Unlike this picture I think that for me, Captain Swan is the biggest ship for me. Their relationship is just my favourite and hello…Captain Hook!!!

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Like seriously though….Captain Swan is the cutest ship in this TV show…Like ever.

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So yes, this post is a lot of rambling of a fangirl BUT I must say that I applaud the directors for casting such amazing people to play the characters at different ages and such… Some of the best casting I’ve seen for something like this.

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Are any of you lovely people Oncers? Or at least heard of OUAT?

 

It’s Time For A Game Of Tag! || Favourite Screen Characters Tag

Hello Readers!

So, today’s tag is pretty simple but a lot of fun! 😀 So, on with it! But first, I want to say a very big thank you to Lisa Hope for tagging me!

Instructions for this tag: For this quick, fun blog hop, you just name your 10 favorite characters from movies or TV, then tag 10 friends (if you can) to do the same!

I am so excited to do this tag! I love watching movies and TV when I can so this is fun for me!! Yay! I can’t believe I can ONLY pick 10 though…This is going to be hard….

 

1. Captain Hook, played by Colin O’Donoghue, from Once Upon A Time

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But seriously though! Just look at that face! *swoons*

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2. Derek Hale, played by Tyler Hoechlin, from Teen Wolf

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3. Elizabeth Bennet, played by Keira Knightley, from Pride and Prejudice

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4. Rose Tyler, played by Billie Piper, from BBC’s Doctor Who

I think she is my absolute favourite. I mean Billie Piper is just so gorgeous! 😀

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5. Newt, played by Thomas Brodie-Sangster, from The Maze Runner Movie

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6. The  Doctor from BBC’s Doctor Who

Why have I not specified which? Because I like the 9th (Christopher Eccleston) and 10th (David Tennant) regeneration of The Doctor….This isn’t cheating. Same guy…

9th Regeneration:

"Hello!"

“Hello!”

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10th Regeneration:

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Need I say more??

 

 

7. Mr. Fitzwilliam Darcy, played by Mathew Macfayden, from Pride and Prejudice

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8. Amy Flemming, played by Amber Marshal, from CBC’s Heartland

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9. Issac Lahey, played by Daniel Sharman, from Teen Wolf

He’s just so cute and adorable and yeah….I’ve got a crush okay? Don’t judge me 😛

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10. Eowyn, played by Miranda Otto, from Lord of The Rings

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TAG YOU’RE IT!

I Tag: Brett @ Brett Michael Orr || Carissa @ Digressions of a Demented Scribe || Erilyn Wendy @ Beyond The Lyrics || Victoria Grace Howell @ Stori Tori’s Blog || Cait @ Paperfury ||