What Jessica Jones Can Teach Us About Abusive Relationships

Abusive relationships are a very real and very horrible problem in our society….Here is what Marvel’s Jessica Jones does to shine a light on this fact.

 

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So I’ve recently watched the TV show Jessica Jones and as I made my way through the show, I started to notice something about the antagonist of the show (played by actor David Tennant) I’ve seen signs on how the antagonist of the show, Kilgrave, though he has super powers, is actually an abuser.

 

Here is what I’ve noticed: In terms of abuse it seems her abusers approach was that of emotional abuse.

What is emotional abuse? It involves a regular pattern of verbal offense, threatening, bullying, and constant criticism, as well as more subtle tactics like intimidation, shaming and manipulation. Emotional abuse is used to control and subjugate the other person, and quite often it occurs because the abuser has childhood wounds and insecurities they haven’t dealt with — perhaps as a result of being abused themselves.

Yes, he has mind controlling powers but the way we have seen them being used, especially on this one character (and the side effects it all had on Jessica Jones) we have seen how he uses it to abuse and control people.

 

  • He is controlling in the sense of always needing to know where she is going, what she is going to be doing, taking her phone and making sure (by making threats he goes through with) she is back within certain time frames.

 

  • Her abuser also plays the victim. (common trait in most abusers) That the actual victim of the abuser is making them do things or something else made them do it. Like things are his victims fault. an example was a conversation in Episode 7 that Jones has with her abuser. (its a little later in the post) There was a time where he would make Jessica Jones hurt herself then make himself save her, pretending to protect her and be the hero or he would make statements such as: “You never appreciate anything I do for you.” making himself the victim and turning it around on Jones herself. Making her think he wasn’t doing anything wrong.

 

  • After her leaving him and getting out of his control, Kilgrave is dead set on finding her and has developed stalker like behaviors (which he probably had before to some extent). Taking photos of her, having others take photos of her and follow her (etc.) Which leads into my last point. Abusers isolate the victim of the abuse. In the scene I’m gonna share in a moment you see this play out in terms of the fact that her abuser is trying to isolate her from everyone she knows. (In this case, killing people close to her doesn’t stop this guy but this is a TV show and a super villain we are talking about in this sense.) In return he is telling her things, professing feelings for her and in result trying to make sure she is isolated and only hearing his words and his opinions.

*spoilers following as I am going to discuss the conversation in this specific scene*

Kilgrave: “I will admit to keeping eyes on you. Spies are easy to come by for me.”

Jones: “Do whatever you are going to do to me, but let them go.” (There is a hostage scene taking place here as Kilgrave is using his powers to hold a whole room of people hostage)

Kilgrave: “Well I have to protect myself so…”

Jones: “Then control me, not them.”

Kilgrave: “I have absolutely no intention of controlling you. I want you to act on your own accord.”

She (Jones) asks: “Act how? Suicide? Is that why you’ve been torturing me?”

Kilgrave, her abuser, then states: “*chuckles* Oh my God, Jessica, I knew you were insecure. That’s just sad. I’m not torturing you. Why would I? I love you.

 

The scene continues and Jones calls her abuser out on his actions calling them a ‘demented declaration of love.’ and how he ruined her life in this act. She couldn’t be any closer to the truth.

Her abuser then says he was trying to make her see “That I’m the only one who matches you… Who challenges you… Who’ll do anything for you.” – In any other case this might almost sound romantic because who doesn’t want to be with someone who will do anything for you or challenges you for the better? But as you can see its not romantic. Not in this sense. Not when he is stalking her, killing her friends and family (he killed a young man who claimed to love Jessica), and becoming obsessive….Trying to get her back.

He then becomes angry (he’s very short fused.) when someones cell phone rings and it interrupts his professing ‘eternal love’

 

 

 

Now sure, no one has superpowers either so this whole abusive situation might be over-dramatized for the show but I feel Marvel was clever in this sense. They took a mind controlling super villain and used him and his abilities to shine a light on abuse. What that looks like and how it might appear to the victim as well. You don’t have to have powers to control or harm someone. If you did this wouldn’t be a real problem, would it? But despite the fact that this character has powers it doesn’t change the fact that he is an abuser and I think Marvel did a really good job in conveying that and not portraying an antagonists actions as okay or somewhat acceptable as most media might convey things.

 

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Time To Share The Love || Inked Book Review

Hello Readers!

Today, I am here to bring you a review of an absolutely fantastic book by Eric Smith. And that book (as you can see in the title) is called ‘Inked’

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Tattoos once were an act of rebellion.

Now they decide your destiny the moment the magical Ink settles under your skin.

And in a world where Ink controls your fate, Caenum can’t escape soon enough. He is ready to run from his family, and his best friend Dreya, and the home he has known, just to have a chance at a choice.

But when he upsets the very Scribe scheduled to give him his Ink on his eighteenth birthday, he unwittingly sets in motion a series of events that sends the corrupt, magic-fearing government, The Citadel, after him and those he loves.

Now Caenum, Dreya, and their reluctant companion Kenzi must find their way to the Sanctuary, a secret town where those with the gift of magic are safe. Along the way, they learn the truth behind Ink, its dark origins, and why they are the only ones who can stop the Citadel.

Eric Smith takes you on a high-octane fantasy adventure, perfect for anyone who has dreamed of being different… only to discover that fate is more than skin deep.

 

This book was absolutely amazing! I loved it! (and am REALLLLLLLLLLLY hoping there is a book two one day.) The first couple chapters I was unsure about where this was going story wise but was really enjoying it but then after those first couple chapters (and the end of interruptions at that very moment when I was trying to read) I was suddenly pulled into this awesome, action packed adventure! and I loved it! I absolutely loved the setting too! It felt like I was standing there amidst everything. I was whisked away to another world for sure! As every chapter went on I fell more and more in love with the characters and the story. Even better some of the characters had super powers! Eep! *jumps up and down in excitement* I mean, it doesn’t get much better than that!…Though, there was one point in the story where I MIGHT have become jealous of this characters powers…I was basically sitting there reading and being like: Hello Character? Yes, yes you. Can you just give me your powers please?

If I had powers, man. It would be all sorts of awesomeness….

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*cough cough* Anyways…back to what I was saying. This book was absolutely amazing and gave me all sorts of feels. Shipping feels, sadness feels…Feels all over the place! The characters were totally awesome and I loved them a lot!

Caenum was a really great character! (being the POV character that is good! :P) I liked his personality and his protective-ness of Dreya just about killed me every single time! It was just so sweet and adorable and- *shipping feels*

With that said, I really liked Dreya’s character as well. She was quite a sweet little thing but most definitely tough and could take care of herself without anyone’s assistance.

I am not going to lie though that Kenzi was my absolute favorite of the bunch though. A little stubborn at times and doesn’t seem to take orders all that well, Kenzi was an interesting addition to the little trio that consisted of himself, Caenum and Dreya. To be honest it seems like Kenzi always brought trouble with him wherever he went. (But that’s the fun of it, right?)…I don’t know if its just me but I found him to be a bit quirky too.

One thing I didn’t like (probably a minor thing in most peoples eyes and shouldn’t hinder you from reading the book! …That would be bad. Don’t not read the book cause of this little note!) was the language in the book. There wasn’t much of it but language in books just isn’t my favorite.  So yeah, just a quick little note there…..

Anyways! My rating for this awesome book is:

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Well, Thats my review! Have you read the book? What are your thoughts on it? Is this book in your TBR pile? (IF so maybe bump it up to next read 😉 )

 

Until Next Time!

Adriana Gabrielle